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Two become one on this journey called life. So happy to hear of your engagement.

I think of you so much that I see you almost everywhere I go.

You and your family are in our prayers. Sorry to hear of your loss.

“Success” all depends on the second letter.

Pity those who don’t feel anything at all.

I wish you a very happy and peaceful Eid ul Adhaa.

I’ve hidden all the Easter candy for the kids inside my stomach.

Fuck everyone who said they were there for me, and then left.

I love you all because hate is my enemy.

My most heavily used kitchen appliance is a fire extinguisher.

Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.

May God Bless you with joy, peace and love on this Christmas.

If It’S Not A Happy Ending Then It’S Not The Ending At All.

Be nice to the nerd. They may be your boss one day.

Hope your birthday blossoms into lots of dreams come true!

When you teach your son, you teach your son’s son.

I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!

May your anniversary be Happy and Grand. Happy Anniversary!

By God, there’s a lot to make you angry.

Talk is cheap, but that’s ok, so are you.