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KARVA CHAUTH FUNNY STATUS: Congratulations to all husbands for renewal of their life insurance. Happy Karva Chauth!

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Here’s wishing a Happy Birthday to the most charming, funny, attractive and rocking personality in town. Have a great day.

I know it’s not big and it’s not clever but F..bad.. me it’s funny!

Making love to me is amazing…

The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible…

Everything’s amazing right now, and nobody’s happy.

Behind every great daughter is a truly amazing dad..

It is so beautiful and inspiring to see such an amazing couple getting engaged. I am so happy for you both!

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snow-blower or vacuum cleaner.

Truthfully, being pregnant is changing me as a person. Each day is part of this amazing journey that has completely shifted the focus of my life and made me reevaluate my personal and professional goals.

I Want To Grow Old With You And Be Able To Say That I Have Lived An Amazing Life With You.

It’s funny how you can still love a person, but you stop needing them like you used to.

In Spain, there is a tradition after a bullfight to serve the mayor the bull’s testicles. – One day after a bullfight, the mayor asks the waiter: “Funny, why are they so small today?” – The waiter: “Today, sir, the bull won.”

You two should be proud of yourselves. It’s amazing that us kids haven’t stressed you out to the point of divorce by now! Happy Anniversary!

Turkeys don’t think Thanksgiving is very funny.

I always call Thanksgiving “Turkey Day” so people know I’m funny, creative and laid back.

Best Wishes to an amazing couple! May you always be filled with love, joy, peace and romance

It’s funny when the dumbest, most selfish, childish person you know, tells people to “Grow up” they must know that’s the ultimate insult coming from them!

I wanna kiss you on December 31st from 11:59 pm to 12:01 am, so I can have an amazing ending to 2015 & a beautiful beginning into 2016.