‘Facebook Jokes’



Dear Google: They are only using you to get to me. Sincerely Wikipedia

Anton, do you think I’m a bad mother? My name is Paul.

Facebook is starting to be like my fridge, I know nothing is there but I keep checking it anyway… rofl.. 🙂

Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in a cafeteria at a MENTAL HOSPITAL.

Why is Facebook like Jail? “You have a profile picture, you sit around all day writing on walls, and you get poked by guys you don’t really know!”

If you can’t Change a Girl…..Change the Girl.

Me and my wife decided that we don’t want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.

I forgot to post on Facebook I was going to the gym. Now this whole workout was a waste of time.

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.

How to make a woman go mmmmmmm all nite long? …………………….. with Duct Tape :)

Thinks that Facebook should change the status question from “what’s on your mind?” to “what’s your problem today?”

Question of the Day: When you wait for a waiter in a restaurant, aren’t you a waiter?

Why r there no phone books in China? Coz there r so many Wing’s and Wong’s, They r afraid u will Wing the Wong number.

FACT: Kissing burns 5.4 calories a minute…… Ummm, wanna work out?

Whatever you do always give 100% ….. Unless you are donating blood :)

Facebook is like a fridge. Even when u know there’s nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.

Whoever said technology will replace paper has obviously never tried to wipe their butt with an iPad.

Status I didn’t fall down, I attacked the floor.

Doctor: Hello, did you come to see me with an eye problem? Patient: Wow, yes, how can you tell? Doctor: Because you came in through the window instead of the door.