‘Dirty Facebook Status’



In a cramped bus.. Lady: Something of yours is touching me. Man: Oh! That’s… that’s just my salary in my pocket. Lady: Did your salary just triple in the last 5 minutes?

No matter how dirty your past is, your future is still spotless.

Hands are so overrated..I think I’ll use my mouth..

I am in love for getting dirty.

Deja poo….. The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before

Without nipples, boobs would be pointless.

Every conversation is more fun if you start with a dirty mind.

People who describe things as “better than sex” are having the wrong kind of sex.

There’s no such thing as a dirty mind, it’s just a sense of humor with adult content.

Smile… it’s the second best thing to do with your lips.

You can’t be the top dog if you act like a pussy!

I think I could fall madly in bed with you..

Fuck everyone who said they were there for me, and then left.

I think the woman who invented the phrase “All Men Are The Same” was a chinese woman who lost her husband in the crowd :)

I wanna do bad things with you.

Please tell your pants it’s rude to point.

Woman without curves is like a road without bends…. You may get to your destination quicker, but the ride is boring as hell.

Me: “Why am I still single?” Brain: “You’re weird as shit.” Body: “And you’re fat.” Face: “Plus you’re ugly.” Food: “But I’m here for you.”

Never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes.

I cant taste my lips could you do it for me..